Sexuality within marriage is a topic that has been overlooked or miscommunicated by the church for a long time, leading to stigmatization of sex and a lack of education and understanding of sexuality as a whole. However, the Bible speaks incredibly positive about sex in the context of marriage and views it as a gift from God created intentionally by God. It is time for the church to embrace and promote sexuality as a beautiful and sensual experience within marriage.
God’s plan for sexual intimacy is one of deep pleasure, emotional, and spiritual connection. Sexual intimacy is more than just a physical act; it involves the whole being. Women are created with multiple pleasure spots, and sexual intimacy is the peak of the union between a husband and wife. The Bible has much to say about God’s plan for sex within the context of marriage. The Song of Solomon, for instance, portrays the beauty and intimacy of romantic love between a man and a woman, highlighting sexual desire and attraction between them.
God designed you to be erotic and sensual
God created humans in His image, emphasizing our importance as God’s special creation, including our sexual identity. In Genesis 1:28, God blessed humans and instructed them to “be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth.” This passage highlights the significance of sexual reproduction in God’s plan for humanity.
However, the church has often failed to embrace this aspect of sexuality. Instead, it has focused solely on the idea of sex as a means of procreation and a way to avoid sin. The church’s failure to embrace the erotic and passionate side of sex has led to the stigmatization of sexual pleasure, especially for women. Women are often taught that their bodies and desires are sinful and that sex is primarily for the pleasure of men.
It is important to educate and empower women to embrace their sexuality and desires. Women should be taught that their bodies and desires are not sinful but are part of God’s intentional design. The church can play a crucial role in breaking down the stigma surrounding sexual pleasure and empowering women to embrace their sexuality fully.
As women, we are expertly designed by God to experience sensuality and physical pleasure. This can be seen in various passages in the Bible, such as in the Song of Solomon, an entire book dedicated to the erotic celebration of sex within marriage. In this book, we see a celebration of physical and emotional intimacy between a man and a woman, highlighting the beauty and sensuality of the human body.
- In Song of Solomon 4:5, the woman’s breasts are described as “like two fawns, twins of a gazelle, that graze among the lilies.” This verse uses vivid imagery to describe the physical beauty of the woman’s breasts, emphasizing the sensuality of her body.
- Song of Solomon 2:1-6 shows the woman describing herself as “a rose of Sharon, a lily of the valleys” and expresses her pleasure in being held by her lover. This passage portrays the woman as a delicate flower, but also as someone who derives pleasure from physical intimacy.
- In Song of Solomon 8:10, the woman describes herself as a “wall” and her breasts as “towers,” symbolizing her strength and fortitude. This passage emphasizes that physical attributes can be sexually desirable to one’s partner.
- And in Song of Solomon 7:7-9, it states “Your stature is like that of the palm, and your breasts like clusters of fruit. I said, “I will climb the palm tree; I will take hold of its fruit.” May your breasts be like clusters of grapes on the vine, the fragrance of your breath like apples, and your mouth like the best wine.” This shows a detailed celebration of a women’s sensual body that delights both her and her spouse.
We see the Bible emphasizes and celebrates sexuality within the marriage bed. Therefore, as Christians and as the Church, we should celebrate our bodies and the physical pleasure that we experience. We should view our bodies as a gift from God and enjoy the pleasures that come with it in a way that honors and glorifies Him.
God designed you to serve your spouse in the marriage bed
Putting the needs of the other above oneself is crucial in intimacy in marriage. Philippians 2:3 states, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility, value others above yourselves.” In the context of marriage, spouses should prioritize the intimacy needs of their partner over their own. Intimacy in marriage involves much more than just physical intimacy. It includes emotional and spiritual intimacy as well. When we prioritize our spouse’s intimacy needs, we are showing them love, respect, and kindness as build a strong and healthy relationship.
Recognizing and deferring to the other’s intimacy needs includes understanding that if intercourse is emotionally or physically painful, that this is NOT God’s design for your marriage bed and the issues need to be addressed with urgency and kindness. Out do one another in showing honor by loving your spouse well and putting your preferences for intimacy aside as you walk with your spouse through physical, emotional, or psychological healing with intimacy and sex.
Putting our spouse’s intimacy needs above our own requires humility and kindness. It means being willing to sacrifice our own desires and needs for the sake of our partner’s well-being. This may involve making time for intimate conversations or activities, being attentive to their emotional needs, or being willing to try new things in the bedroom that may not be our personal preference.
Ultimately, putting our spouse’s intimacy needs above our own is a reflection of Christ’s love for us. As we seek to love our spouse as Christ loves us, we will be blessed with a fulfilling and satisfying marriage relationship.
God created sex to be a beautiful and essential part of human life within the context of marriage. Sexual intimacy is one of deep pleasure, emotional, and spiritual connection. It is time for the church to embrace and promote sexuality as a beautiful and sensual experience within marriage. Education, empowerment, and communication are essential to break down the stigma surrounding sexual pleasure and empower women to embrace their sexuality fully. When we prioritize our spouse’s intimacy needs, we show them love and respect, and we build a strong and healthy relationship that reflects Christ’s love for us.