One of the hardest truths for me to believe about myself was that I am a sensual, sexual woman, and God sees this as good. But healing from this distorted view of my sexual design allowed me to progress in healing from vaginismus.
Unfortunately ideas like purity culture have perpetuated the idea that sensuality is something to be hidden, subdued, shamed, and ridiculed. The idea that a women was designed to experience pleasure and to express her sexuality teeters on the line of sin. This fosters ideas of suppression, shaming, and can lead to conditions like vaginismus or painful sex.
But what if we viewed our sensuality as a divine gift, intricately woven into the fabric of our existence by the Creator Himself?
Embracing the God’s Design
The Scriptures tell us that God created humanity in His own image (Genesis 1:27). This means that every facet of our being, including our sensuality, is a reflection of the divine nature. Our sexuality and sensuality was not a result of the fall. Sexual desire wasn’t a surprise to God. He created us with sensuality in mind. God’s intention in creating us as sensual beings was not to provoke shame or guilt but to celebrate the beauty and intricacy of His creation. Our senses, emotions, and physical bodies are all part of the magnificent design that God pronounced as “very good” (Genesis 1:31).
God’s divine plan extends to the realm of human sexuality, where marriage becomes a sacred playground for the intimate connection between husband and wife. In this union, God intended for sexuality to be a joyful expression of love, trust, and vulnerability. Just as He designed our bodies and sensuality, He intricately wove the gift of sexual intimacy into the fabric of marriage. Embracing, seeking out, and thoroughly enjoying one another is not only permissible but also encouraged.
The notion that only one partner should find delight in sexual experiences is a misunderstanding; God’s intention is for both husband and wife to equally revel in the pleasures of their union. I mean, God did design the clitoris as an organ solely for women’s pleasure (the male has to share his pleasure organ with his plumbing!). This encompasses the belief that the wife’s sexual fulfillment is just as significant as the husband’s, fostering an environment where mutual satisfaction, respect, and deep connection flourish. As we honor God’s design for marital intimacy, we discover a space where our sensual and sexual sides harmoniously unite, fostering a bond that is both spiritually and physically enriching- the way God designed sex and intimacy in marriage to be!
Overcoming Cultural Stigmas
Unfortunately, society has often placed limitations and expectations on women’s sensuality. Purity culture and unhelpful societal norms have led many to feel shame or guilt about embracing their God-given sensuality. Many women may feel that embracing sexual confidence makes them promiscuous. Sexual confidence is often a male-associated trait, so for a woman to display this can cause sexual dissonance. However, it’s crucial to recognize that these beliefs are not in line with the Creator’s intentions. By reconnecting with the truth that God declared His creation, including our sensual selves, as good, we can free ourselves from the constraints of purity culture and societal expectations to embrace our true design.
Embracing our Sensuality
Embracing our sensuality from a spiritual perspective empowers us to reclaim ownership of our bodies and desires. When we view our sensuality as a gift from God, we acknowledge that it’s a fundamental part of who we are. It’s not something to be hidden or suppressed; rather, it’s an aspect of our identity that deserves respect and celebration. When we fully embrace this, we find freedom in marriage to connect deeper, love greater, and experience the amazing array of sensations God designed for each of us.
Embrace the “Good” God designed
In a world where messages about sensuality often range from objectification to shame, it’s refreshing to turn to the timeless wisdom of Scripture. God’s declaration that His creation, including our sensual and sexual nature, is “good” invites us to see ourselves through His eyes. Embracing our sensuality, both male and female, as a divine gift allows us to celebrate the unique beauty of our bodies, emotions, and desires. By aligning our perspectives with God’s design, we can break free from cultural constraints and live empowered lives that honor both our faith and our identity as sensual, sexual women.